Season 8, 5-6AM: Rollercoaster

Now we're starting to learn what they're talking about! What's the scariest part of a roller coaster? It's that slow, clickety, clackety trip up the first great big hill, thinking what it's gonna feel like as you crest the top and the bottom falls out.  Hmmm, that seems a lot like what torture must feel like, too (though we have far less torture this season--Jack hasn't threatened a single eyeball).  24 this season has milked all it could outta that hill.  OK, it could have milked more.  We're down to the last 10 hours of 24 ever--at least on TV--but this last season could have climbed that hill for all of them.   But now, just as the suspense over whether this is the last season (apparently, but I don't trust anything about this show!) ends, it's cooking more and more.

Last week we brought Renee back, CTU went down, Chloe threatened a federal officer to bring it back up, Jack lost his deadeye and turned into an armadillo, and a mole in CTU was revealed to us.  This week, the terrorist makes his threat, the internal intrigue within the White House jumps through the roof (about where we've come to expect it on 24), Jack gets his deadeye back, Renee disagrees with Jack ("I'm coming with you this time, and there's no arguing!") to which he acquiesces, and the US president shows she's learned something from dealing with terrorists (or listening to my council) all these years.

Let's start with President Taylor.  She's assembled her advisers in a hastily convened situation room (I kinda wonder how they all got there so fast, but I'm gonna pretend I have a pretty little head), the terrorist calls, and she puts it on speaker (I'm not sure she'd take that live like that, but I'll apply my PLH), he says, "Good morning.  [I could see Pres Taylor fighting to remain presidential and not snap, "What's so good about it?"]  I don't want to kill innocents [huh?], but turn over Islamic Pres or I blow this Popsicle stand," (meaning literally and Manhattan), and Pres Taylor shows she doesn't have a PLH by saying, "No way, Jose" (I wonder why she thought his name was Jose).  "Jose" hangs up, and a couple advisers try to talk Taylor into giving up Islamic Pres.  I'm jumping up and down (as much as cat on my lap lets me) yelling, "NO!" Ethan shows he's still as sharp as ever by backing Taylor on this one.  And Taylor preaches to the converted and non-converted--"If we give in to him, how do we know we can trust him?  And we'll just be setting a precedent of caving.  And Americans always pull together when the chips are down."  Well, 2 out of 3 sound and applicable reasons ain't bad, though she forgot about: how do we know he won't simply continue to ask for things?

Ah, but there you see the seeds of suspense.  General Balls First takes Weasel adviser aside and hatches the quintessential cockamamie scheme--let's get my special ops guys to kidnap Islamic Pres and hand him over to terrorist, making it look like the terrorists did it--then we can cave, save Manhattan, and not look like we caved.  My guys will have the element of surprise, and we outnumber them.  All Weasel has to do is get the evac route of Islamic Pres from Ethan's computer.  Weasel is wary, and tells General that Bauer is with the evac team.  General is nonplussed, er unfazed, even after Weasel tells him not to underestimate Jack.  Too bad for the special ops guys Weasel didn't tell General that Renee was along, too.

Surprisingly, Ethan comes into his office just as Weasel is getting the info from Ethan's computer.  Weasel and General come up with a shaky, if plausible explanation, but Ethan's had to deal with Olivia 4 years ago--he doesn't buy it, and he's subtle enough to play pocket pool and accidentally speed dial Jack using the cell phone in his pocket (yeah, I always have Jack on my speed dial when it's been 4 years since he's been active--oops, my PLH went on the fritz).  Surprisingly many seconds after Jack says, "Hello," Weasel and General figure out what just happened, and Ethan has a Leo-like heart attack--wow, without coincidences, you can't tell a story.

Ultimately, that's enough for Jack.  100 yards from the ambush, Jack's worries about the phone call from Ethan turn him and the evac team around.  Special ops think about it for a moment, then open fire (I could almost hear them say, "Aw heck, let's just shoot it out with Jack.  He's been missing a lot lately.").  Too bad for them the lead on the Secret Service detail is a woman.  She tells Jack to get Islamic Pres and family to safety, and I almost hear Jack say, "It's been an honor working with you."  Jack and family head back, while Secret Service shoots it out, pea shooters against Howitzers (well, it feels like that to me--mostly hand guns against machine guns).  Secret Service admirably acquits itself, Kayla shows why she's along (to trip and turn an ankle--way, way unnecessary gratuitous suspense), and Jack, Renee and family almost make it to safety before having to make a stand.  Jack tosses Pres a gun (after first denying the request), then tells Renee to start firing in 5s.  He tosses a smoke grenade (why'd he wait till now to use it?  With all that other stuff around, can't he McGyver anything better?), she fires, Special Ops heads into the smoke, Jack takes out 2 armored soldiers with 2 pistol shots.  He's got his mojo back!

We have some more coordination between smoke and Jack and Renee, and about the time I've lost count of Jack's shooting prowess and remaining Special Ops and his remaining bullets, one of 'em gets Jack in his sites--only to be taken down!  Not by Renee, but by Pres!!!  And Pres is a crack pot, er, shot--he shoots to wound, which is convenient because this one was the leader of the team, and he's all too willing to spill all the beans to Jack.  I guess Special Ops are no longer trained on withstanding interrogation.  Writers try to build suspense that Jack will see the logic in turning Pres over to terrorist, but nah, which Jack confirms by saying he takes orders from only the President (who'd called him earlier to order him to lead the evac--one sign the season is winding down: President Taylor starts making the right calls).

Back at CTU, Dana is feeding the terrorists all sorts of intell, Chloe starts to think it's odd that the satellite feed went down just as Freddy was about to corner the terrorists (doesn't she know a story is built of coincidences?), and Director Dopey gives a pep talk including saying it's against federal law for any of them to warn loved ones about to get blown up (I guess they wised up after CTU weasel last season/yesterday broke all sorts of protocols to warn his wife, while he was sleeping with the enemy).  OK, don't tell the feds, but I'm warning you and my wife--anyone in the Upper West Side better start thinking about evacuating--as easy as that's gonna be with rush hour starting and all the points of entry to Manhattan closed.  Wouldn't that have given my PLH a hint already?  A hint of panic, perhaps.  But good thing the bomb made it across the river--Brooklyn is OK.



I've been think about the shark for a while.  Thinking of that almost since the nuclear bomb went off about 6 seasons ago.  Wondering how could the show not have reached its peak right then?  But we've had Jack going undercover with a Mexican drug lord, kicking heroin, rescuing a hijacked shopping mall with a gun to his head, being shipped to China, foiling a twisted US President, Tony coming back to life, and planes falling out of the sky over DC.  Oh, me of little faith.  This show keeps on surprising.  So, what about this season's thrill ride?  We've had precious little actual mayhem.  And that's one thing I look forward to with this show--it breaks boundaries, it does what other shows don't, it shows people dieing who shouldn't, it shows terrorist threats that actualize.  What's gonna happen this, last, culmination season?  Well, the clock says about 10 min till the dirty little bomb contaminates 40 square blocks of NYC--is that really gonna happen?  It could on this show.

What's left after that resolves--for the season, that is?  Dana already told terrorist not to blow it up because then he loses leverage.  That's the problem with these threats, you know--if you don't carry through you've lost leverage, but if you shoot your wad, you've also lost leverage.  More good reasons never to cave when under threat.  And my favorite part--the scenes of next week, though I liked that one week when they told me just when to look for certain key events--tease me with a shot of ex-Pres Logan (there's still hope for Tony, especially with this being the last season, and wouldn't it be great if Michelle is really alive, too?) and with Dana confronting Jack.  Wow, a 2 hour night next week! Sphere: Related Content